A Lady's Ruminations

"Jane was firm where she felt herself to be right." -Jane Austen, Pride and Prejudice


Friday, June 08, 2007

Paris' Slammer Syndrome

Over at Townhall.com, Janet M. LaRue (chief counsel for CWA) has a great column:

Hilton’s Slammer Syndrome Results in Premature Evacuation

LaRue seems to have a great sense of humor. Here is a portion:

Until Barbara Walters or Diane Sawyer attends to Paris Hilton’s obsessive compulsive media attention disorder, or until her publicist appears at a press conference to explain her “medical condition,” we can only guess at the affliction that served to spring Paris’s privileged posterior from the Los Angeles County jail.

Some common afflictions of the rich and shallow come to mind:

* Beverly Hills Nervosa: Tremors associated with residing outside the 90210 zip code

* Follicle Phobia: Fear of combing her own hair

* Congenital Servantitis: Catatonic state caused by separation from hot and cold running servants

* Media Aphasia: Inability to speak with anyone not wearing a press badge

* Jumpsuit Fever: Shortness of breath from wearing ugly clothing

* Disconjunctivitis: Inability to look at regular people
You really should read the rest of these "common afflictions of the rich and shallow" (not to mention the rest of the column).

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